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Caption competition
 JOY GWALTNEY |
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“OK: Lights, camera and ......faction” CAROLINE SHUTTLEWORTH THE GAFCON caption competition photo brought out the best in Church Times readers (as we knew it would): scurrilous, disrespectful, vulgar, but always honouring to the Lord — once we had weeded out the ones that weren’t. And some of the contributors confessed to being GAFCON supporters. To get the inevitable play on the name out of the way first: “You film the gaffe, and I’ll film the con” (Mary Hawkins). Richard Hough was more inventive: “The shareholders who had turned up for the GAZPROM annual meeting were surprised to find that Mr Putin was not in charge.” An entry from Charles Taylor: “The medical correspondent thought the slogan was a misprint: ‘GAFCON? Surely they mean GAVISCON — for dyspepsia and flatulence”, spelt out what Alan Wright just hinted at: “It took several high-ranking officials to launch the Anglican Church’s purgative medicine.” There was a strain of footballing entries: “Well, Brian, the manager says I’ve got to play in midfield, so . . .” from Richard Wood; and “Mr Abramovich is looking for someone who can be on the left wing one minute and on the right the next, so we have all signed for Chelsea” from John Haskell. There was more word play from Don Manley: “Media interest was unexpectedly high when the first heterosexual player was introduced by the chairman of the Gay Anglican Football Club Of Nigeria”; and from Phelim McIntyre (our favourite): “The GAFCON five-a-side team admitted that they had too many people who were only willing to play on the right wing.” Some more general themes: “The delegates had a zero-course dinner at the G8 (Africa) Food Conference” (Jonathan Haigh); “Making the latest training video for ordinands: ‘How to concelebrate an informal eucharist’” (M. J. Leppard); “The only reason there were so many press around was that they thought it was Jordan speaking, not speaking from Jordan” (Dorothy Bowkett); and “The press conference was going fine until someone asked what a man in a pink frock had against gays” (Stephen Disley). We liked the dry wit from Colin Sowter: “Looking at the two groups, I’m wondering which has the more negatives.” And we were flattered by the name-check in Peter Holdridge’s entry: “Got A Funny Caption Or Not? The Church Times launches a high-profile advertising campaign for its favourite competition.” But the fairtrade chocolate, kindly donated by Divine (divinechocolate.com) went to one of the shortest entries. Have a go at our next caption-competition picture |
 People dancing in the street |
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Send your captions by 25 July in one of these ways: by email to: captioncompetition@churchtimes.co.uk by post (postcards only) to: Caption Competition, Church Times, 13-17 Long Lane, London EC1A 9PN by fax to: 020 7776 1086 |
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